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Published 17:18 25 Feb 2022 GMT
Updated 17:34 25 Feb 2022 GMT

Ivan, pictured with his protest poster.[/caption]
If you’re Russian, your situation is only worsened by the pain of knowing people in Ukraine. Nikolay, who is 20 and from St Petersburg, speaks to Ukrainian friends online and can feel their fear even through the messages. “Yesterday we were talking like nothing, and today they have rockets galore, and I am just observing it. Their country is a warzone.”
Nikolay mentions potential conscription to the Russian military, saying he would feel “sickened” to have to hurt Ukrainian citizens. “They are, despite everything else, our brother nation.” But he also worries about the impact on his country of potential US and NATO retaliation. One thing’s for sure though, his fight is not against Ukraine.
For Vladislav Davidzon, that pain of knowing someone Ukrainian is even closer: it is his wife, and the two of them are currently in Kyiv together. “My wife has asked me to burn my Russian passport when I get back home to her,” he said yesterday, “and I am going to do it.” When I ask Vladislav to expand on this point, I check his social media and realise he has been moved to a bomb shelter in Kyiv and told to stay away from the windows, with the air raid siren sounding overhead.
https://twitter.com/VladDavidzon/status/1497153932526825489?s=20&t=rHKqiVLmP8oIlhKvjsn7Tw
That’s what life is like in Ukraine right now - not just worry, but life-threatening fear. “We’re worried about our economy and what will happen next,” says Vera. “Uncertainty is hard, but hearing missiles over your head is another level.”
And it’s not just uncertainty pulsing through the streets of Russia right now: it’s anger. When hundreds of people defy solo picketing rules and riot police gather in multiple cities and protest, a move which will almost certainly lead to imprisonment, you know rage is a driving force.
“Everyone is tired of hate, tired of economic sanctions, tired of our president. We empathize with Ukrainians,” Vera says. “Even my politically inactive friends were thinking of protesting. A lot of people say that they are ashamed to live in an aggressor country.” Vera is ashamed too. She says that if the war continues but Russia’s borders do not close, she will flee her country out of shame. And despite having lived in Russia her whole life, she declares: ‘There is no way I’m having kids in this country now."Wainwright fire kills several at Canada military base
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